Feelin' like....

 

the most horrible mother ever. EVER.

Robert is in FL for some kind of convention. Emma and i have been on our own for almost five days now...Emma keeps asking for him. "Wheres dada? Dadadaaa?" she'll ask frequently during the day. Yeah, he's the 'fun' one, i'm the diaper changin' lady, the stuffed animal finder, book reader and food giver. ;) Emma and i have kept busy...me by packing stuff for our move and Emma by "unpacking" stuff that i pack. Needless to say, not much has gotten done.

This afternoon, i could tell that Emma was ready for her nap. We were both on the floor and she was playing with her barrel full of monkeys (she knows all of the colors and numbers, btw!) and she was getting frustrated as she couldn't get the lid on the top of the barrell. Finally, frustration won, and she threw the barrell lid and turned around and hit me in the face, catching the corner of my eye. I sat there, completly stunned. I sat up, grabbed her arms and said sternly, "Emma, we do not hit. Hitting hurts." She tried to hit me again...so i picked her up and carried her upstairs. She was very upset, screaming for Paci, her beloved stuffed pink elephant. I got her to her crib, put her in it and told her that it was nap time. I then closed the door to her crying....

....and sat on the other side of the door and cried along with her. Within 5 minutes, it was competley silent in Emma's room. I went down stairs and got Paci, went back to Emma's room and snuck in. She was asleep, cuddled up in her cute sleeping position with her tush in the air. I put Paci under her arm, smoothed her hair, covered her up and silently apologized for getting angry.

Still, I was upset...upset that i got angry that she hit me. I know that Emma doesn't mean it...she's a child, and she's frustrated that she can't speak yet and get the words out that she needs--and it was naptime. But i was ashamed. Ashamed that i was angry at my little daughter. It's not the first time that she's hit me--i had a conversation with her preschool teacher to ask about her hitting and she said that she's only seen Emma hit once in the entire time that she's been there. She hit a little girl named Julie after Julie hit her in the face, trying to get a toy that Emma had. Emma has never hit her teachers. She did tell me that it is a phase that children sometimes go through, for me not to be upset about it and that Emma would grow out of it. A friend of mine that i spoke to about this said that her son also is a hitter. The only thing that has gotten her son's attention is when they spank him on the tush for hitting. I don't think that approach is going to work for me--spanking a small child because she hit? I'm going to spank her on the tush to get my point across that you shouldn't hit?

So, i'm feelin' yucky.

I'm off to find some chocolate. I hope that there's some in this house....and that i haven't packed it.

Have you seen this little girl?

 

This photo was taken last year on Emma's birthday. I love this photo of her...but this little baby, has grown into a little girl. She isn't a baby anymore....and while that makes me a little sad, seeing this new phase of her life has been amazing. Her vocabulary is expanding and i'm amazed to watch her speak. Today was a day of a lot of firsts:

~Today after Mother's Day Out, Emma walked down all of the stairs to the parking lot, holding my hand. Usually, she gets on her bottom at each stair, but not today.

~She brought me her favorite book and handed it to me and said " Weed Gooonitee Gorrilllla". (Read Goodnight, Gorrilla).

~Tonight, as i was finishing up laundry, she came to me, smiled and said "i poopy". She was rubbing her eyes, so i asked her if she was ready for nite-nite. She said "wes" and started gathering all five of her Backyardigans and Cupcake the Pink Elephant and started up the stairs to her room. And it was only 6:45pm!!!!

It's been a very good day....

A Valentine's Surprise!

 

Well, not exactly a "Valentine's Day Surprise", but Emma's Certificate of Citizenship showed up the day before Valentine's Day. We have been patiently (okay, okay, not so much) waiting for the COC for almost 9 months now. In the state of TN, when you re-adopt a child, they automatically become American Citizens, but i just wanted that COC paper! We have two steps left: one, a ss card and a passport. I've applied now for the ss card and the woman at the SS office promised me that it won't take nearly the time that it took to get the COC!

Valentine's Day was nice...i made cupcakes and we had dinner out at Chef's. It was a good day. And of course, Emma and i got flowers from Robert. Emma made a frame for us at her preschool class--Emma and i delivered it to Robert's office and he managed to keep it before i could take a photo of it.

Birthday photos to follow....yes, my little one is now TWO YEARS OLD. :))

Behind door number 1....

 

We (okay, 'i') am at what feels like a frantic pace. It's now official and unless something totally unforseen happens, we will be moving. Moving from a home that i love, a house that we brought Emma home to, a home where we became a family. I love the house we are in now. This house has amazing windows where you can see the tops of the trees; when i sit on the back deck, it's almost like sitting in a tree house. Lots of windows and lots of light. My plants are happy here. Our house is very close to Moss Wright Park...which is such a nice park to walk to with Emma. There are nature trails, a doggy park, and of course, a play ground. Can you tell that i don't want to leave?

The thing is, it's a wonderful house that we are moving to. It has a big fenced in back yard, which we don't have now. It's in an amazing school district for Emma. It's close the the YMCA. Lots of churches near by. It's an amazing investment for us. Robert is so excited about this new house that he is acting like a little kid. And i do love the kitchen. And the master bath. But honestly? I feel like the wet blanket on this little move of ours. I have seemed to finally settle in and have made a few friends. I have always had a lot of aquaintences, but few close friends. I'm a slow friend maker, lol...but i belong to a MOPS group that i truly enjoy, i have neighbors that are truly nice and look out for me and i can find my way around without getting lost (at least i don't get lost on MOST days!). I love the folks a the Publix where i shop. I found a wonderful dry cleaners here and enjoy talking to the woman who ownes it. I even know the folks at the post office!

Oh, and of course, i feel guilty for feeling that this is a wonderful move for Robert and Emma and not for me. It's not about me. Right? It's about my family and where it's best for us to be as a family. So, i have basically two doors--
behind door number one, i can just say out loud that i hate this idea of moving and go kicking and screaming like a small child. Or, behind door number two, i can decide that i will make the best of this move because it is the best move for Robert and Emma. And really, with the economy the way it is right now, we are lucky to be able to move.

Yeah, not much choice in how i should pull up the big girl panties and get on with it, right?

The painters have been here for a week and are done with the upstairs and the main floor. They are now working on the basement and garage area. I do have to say, this group of painters has been wonderful. They are on time, work quickly and of course, have entertained Emma when she HAS to see what they are doing. She tells them "Hola!" every morning! So very cute, lol...

....all that is pretty much left is to pack and organize. We close on this house in March so time is ticking away. I still have a few closets to do and a lot of other general packing. I really wish that i could do the nose twiting thing and have the house packed....like the "Bewitched" show? :)) I have gotten rid of a lot of stuff....Robert's records (we never, ever played them....), books were donated, furniture donated and i'm going through Emma's baby clothes. Luckily there is a MOPS mom in my group who can use the clothes, so they will go to her and her little one.

I gotta go get Emma....she has learned to open the door to the basement a few days ago and i'm sure that she wants to visit with our painters!

Snow Day!

 

 

 

 

Well, not really a "SNOW" day....but some of the snow did stick. So, for us, it is a snow day! :)

Robert went into work and Emma and i, well, we stayed in. We are both still fighting off colds...much smarter to stay inside, i think. I'm sure that all of the 'snow' will melt by mid-day, but it really is beautiful to look at. And it's easier to say that snow is beautiful when you don't see it very often! I would like to have a white Christmas but i don't think that i would enjoy living somewhere that has a lot of snow. I'm more of a beachy-kinda-girl...you know, the toes-in-the-sand?

But for today, i'll enjoy the snow! :)

A bloggy break....

 

After a long, unplanned bloggy break, i'm back. :)

Thank you, Keri, for checking on me. :))

Lots going on....we've found a new house. Paperwork is being done, so we'll see. It's in a new school district for Emma (that's why we are moving) with a fenced in big back yard and it's a really wonderful house. But i love this house that we are in now....but i'm sure that things will work out the way that they should. I'm half excited, half dreading a move...but it truly is for the best. After all, this is the house where i met Robert for the first time and where we became a family. Hard to leave such good memories. It's not in this town and for that, i'm very sad. But change can be a good thing and if it means i get a really cool kitchen, well, then, sign me up! ;)

All of our Christmas stuff is finally put away and packed up. I loved our tree as Emma did. It's always sad to me to pack up all of the Christmas stuff at the end of the season, for some reason. I am hoping that next year, we can drag out ALL of our stuff and put up the really big tree that we have as well as my silver tree. Yes, i have a silver tree! I love that tree....i have photos of me under that tree when i was a baby. Robert keeps threatening to sell it on ebay as he is sure that he can get lots of money for it, lol...

Emma is her usual funny self...she is now 23 months old. Her birthday is quickly approaching....growing up, we did 'family' birthdays (you know, birthday girl gets to pick out her cake, dinner and what we will do on said birthday) so we are going to continue with that tradition. I am sure that as Emma gets older, this will change as she is SO much more social than i am. She truly loves people and i don't think is going to embrace (nor tolerate!) my loner existence and practice of having lots of friends but only a few good friends. She will have many close friends, as my husband does, i'm sure.

This was Emma this morning as i was doing my best to finish laundry. Yeah, she's not much help, yet, is she? ;)

Presents....

 

 

 

To remember to charge your battery camera is extremely important. If you forget, well, you then miss lots of photo taking opportunities. How do i know this? Don't ask... ;)

But here are three of Emma before the ol' battery in my camera decided that it had enough photos. Never mind that i wasn't done yet...thankfully, the video camera captured what i didn't.

Emma got the hang of unwrapping presents pretty quickly. She loved the Little People Nativity Scene and the Inn Scene with the three Kings and all of the wonderful animals that are now scattered throughout the house. Robert found a donkey in the shower this morning....and i found baby Jesus perched on the lid of the toilet so i was able to save baby Jesus from drowning. The excitement of seeing the tree, all of the lights, the presents was even better than i had imagined it would be. Truly a magical day that i will never forget.

In all, it was a wonderful day...but i missed my sister and my Mom a great deal. I missed the three of us in the kitchen, talking, laughing and listening to Christmas music and singing together in our off key voices. I miss the Spanish cookies and meats, i miss my Mom's wedding cookies. I know how to make these things, but for some reason, well, they don't turn out the way that they did when she made them. With my Mom gone and now that i have a family, new traditions are now being added....Robert and i made the best lasagna with fantastic garlic bread for Christmas Dinner. I imagine that we will be adding some Guatemalan touches to our Christmas in years to come. This year i managed to order some really beautiful ornaments from MayanFamilies along with our new tradition of getting Emma a new ornament every year. Last year was the traditional "Baby's First Christmas" and this year? Elmo, of course!

Off to pick up Little People.... :))

Hangin' with Santa....

 

We braved the mall traffic today to take Emma to see Santa. She did very well....i felt sorry for the two mothers ahead of us whose children were not in the Christmas spirit and let everyone know it. I have to say that seeing Santa on Christmas Eve is the way to go as we were in and out of the mall within 45 minutes! This will be our tradition, i think...taking Emma to see Santa on Christmas Eve.

The photo on the left was taken on Christmas Eve last year....

My little one isn't so little anymore, is she?

For some reason, my scan didn't come out too clear, so click on the photo and you can view the photo a little better.

Merry Christmas, everyone...

A Christmas Photo

 

I am 'almost' on schedule....my Christmas cards have all been long gone, all presents except two are wrapped, i've taken care of the mailman (he's really the best mailman i've ever had), the babysitter, Robert's office sales folks and his account reps and our neighbors. All i have left is some baking to do....and it's for enjoyment more than anything. So, i'm feelin' pretty pleased. Of course, after i bake, i'll be making the rounds back to my neighbors to pass out my goodies as i have no willpower when there are Christmas treats around! :)

Seeing the magic of Christmas through Emma's eyes has been nothing short of amazing. She loves our tree with all of the colored lights and has only taken one candy cane off the tree. To our great surprise, she's also left alone the packages that are under the tree! Emma and i have done lots of visiting stores to see the "twees"...she gets so excited and points and shouts "TWWWEEEES". What a perfect, special Christmas it has been! Emma has shown Robert and i the magic of Christmas that i think as adults, well, we sometimes forget. We haven't visited Santa yet but plan on going on Wednesday morning. Last year's trip to see Santa went really well, so i am hoping for the same magic again.

A MOPS friend and i 'adopted' a family this year that she knew who was in need. It was really nice to be able to go to the store and get the things that she knew that they needed. A bunch PJs for the children, gloves and scarf for the mother, and of course, toys for the little ones. I was lucky enough to go with Marci to the family's house to meet them. Such a young family with two beautiful little children. I am hoping that the New Year brings only good things to this family....

My Dad will be spending Christmas in FL with my sister and her children. My sister and her husband are still in the mist of uncertainty of their marriage. I hope that they will get some clarity and be able to work through their many issues. I am sometimes happy that my Mom isn't here to see how things have worked out for them this year-she truly would have been very, very upset. But then, maybe she could have offered some help to get them through this difficult time. I miss my Mom so very much....

Off to try a new candy recipe.... :)

Guess who is 22 months old today?

 

Yep...my little Emma is 22 months old today! She had a big day out at her Mother's Day Out class today, too....they had their 'Christmas Party' and had presents and they ate Happy Meals. It was her first Happy Meal, too! I am told that she enjoyed her fries (what a surprise, eh?) and played with her hamburger and ate all of her fruit. Robert and i were given a present from Emma which is under our tree. It's killing me not to sneak a peek, but i promised Robert that i would wait~good luck to me on that promise!

At 22 months, Emma is 24.5 pounds and 31.5 inches high. She can open doors, go up and down all of our stairs with ease (crawling or on her bottom), play in the toilets, almost climb out of her crib and is able to talk in sentences like "Where's dada?" or "Where's mama?". It seems that every day, i notice something new that she has learned...we are working on colors and she can hand me her five blocks by color when i ask for them by color. She is hugely attached to "Cupcake" who is her pink stuffed elephant. She can also say "abuela" when she looks at my Mom's photo on the frig. I'm sure that like most parents, i have conversations with her that only i can understand, lol...Robert sometimes looks at me when i 'translate' for him. And she loves to play "Weee" with Robert. The game consists of his putting her on his shoulders and prancing through the house or swinging her in his arms. The giggles from both of them are truly cute and this game is played out every evening when he comes home from work. I don't know who looks forward to this game of their more...Robert or Emma.

Happy 22 months, dear Emma! We love you so very much....