Quiet Heart

My husband always jokes with me that i have "hamsters running around in my brain" because i often try to do, oh, a million and one things at a time. He's right, of course, but i would never admit to having hamsters running around up there! The past few days, oddly enough, i have been quiet. It's almost as if i am on the borderline of having a peaceful heart about all of this. I like to think that it's because of the prayers said on my behalf from friends. I still don't know how all of this will turn out but calls from friends have been so helpful. Don't ever underestimate how just a phone call can help someone's spirits! It helps to hear that someone you know has had this happen to them. It helps to hear that i am not the only one who has the imagination that leads the mind to places where it has no benefit of going. And it helps to know that your friends are praying for you.

Perhaps this is what it is all about: a forceful reminder of how blessed i truly am. In the rush of the day, trying to be who i think i should be, i sometimes loose track of just how blessed i am. Even if this lesson for me isn't about that, i have truly learned to say 'Thank you, Lord, for each wonderful day' and learning to have grace when well, things aren't as wonderful as i would like them to be. I also seem to forget that God does answer prayers....he just may not answer them as "i" think that he should. Turning things over to the Lord is a hard, hard task for this control-driven woman that i am....but i think that i am SLOWLY (and i mean ever so SLOWLY!) learning.

My results from Monday's biopsy are in. Of course, no, they won't tell you over the phone no matter how sweet and funny you are; believe me, i tried. My husband and Emma are coming with me to keep me company. Emma has been the best thing for me-it's hard to hide under the covers when "someone" pulls them off of you and yells "bbbooooo!"

And so, we shall see. But thank you so very, very much for your emails, notes, calls-they have meant more to me than you'll ever know.