Oh, I'm Leavin' On A Jet Plane.....

...and i'm not exactly thrilled about it. :(

I'm leaving on Friday to visit my sister in FL. She's going through what is shaping up to be a nasty divorce and custody battle and she's asked me to come visit to help her get settled in the home she's rented. We've not been together, alone since before my neice was born almost 9 years ago; growing up, we were 4 years apart so we didn't have much in common and well, i truly don't think that we 'liked' each other. We are just so very different; she's a Martha Stewart clone, i'm well, just not. I'm very 'lets save the earth' and she thinks it's a 'pain' to recycle. I'm a "we-should-help-the-less-fortunate' she thinks that they should help themselves. She's a whiz at decorating, i'm not. She's extremely thin, and i'm more the curvy (ha!) type. I loved to run, she hated to run. She's always had her act together (okay, until now she has always had her act together) and i've been the black sheep finding her way. I loved to read, bake and she's all about being social with tons of friends. Amazing how different sisters can be! ;)

It's ironic how the death of my Mom made the one thing my Mom always wanted to happen, well happen; we became closer. Perhaps it's because we both have children or maybe it's just because we've grown up or it could be that we now realize that we are the only family that we truly have left. I've never been jealous of my sister for all of the things that she has had in her life....until my niece was born. My sister became what i always wanted to be....a Mother. But my niece was such a fantastic little girl and i LOVED being an aunt. I LOVED IT! I bought presents, i read to her, i played with her, spent holidays with her....and i loved every moment of it.

Her new home is very near to the beach-within walking distance so i'm excited about that. And i'm only going for three days, so that's good, too. What is not good?

Emma is not coming with me.

Words can't possibly tell you how my heart already aches that she won't be with me. I won't be here to see her in the mornings-my favorite part of the day. When i go into her room in the mornings, she immediately stands up, cheers "yay" and holds up Mr. Cupcake and grins ear to ear and calls me "Mama". My heart swells every morning as this plays out. I won't be able to feed her breakfast, nor chase her around our home, nor read to her, or giggle with her for three days. While i know it's going to be good for my sister to have me with her to help her set up her new home, i am so going to miss my Emma.

Oh, and my husband, too, who is reading over my shoulder as i type this. :))

There is a lot for me to do before i leave....so i guess i should get started.

But first, it's time to sneak into Emma's room and watch her sleep.