If one of us gets sick.....

....it's a safe bet that all three of us will pass it around with me catching the worst of it.

Emma woke up on Thursday feeling like yuck very, very (did i say VERY?) early. Off to the couch she and i went, with Pachi, the blue blankets, all of the dinos and pillows. Robert soon joined this little party, just to check in on his girls and help me medicate the tot.

Yep, Princess of Dino Land was sick and with fever.

And so, began a day of being in our pjs, parked on the couch; Princess of Dino Land, all of her Dinos, Pachi and the servant me.

Mid-morning, Emma asked for cracker and some tea. I, being the "Serf of Princess of Dino Land", jumped up to get the requested food and drink.

I was only gone from the upstairs family room long enough to get a tray, put crackers, cheese, a glass of tea and a LARGE Diet Coke for me before i went back to the family room. Really, and honestly, i was not gone long.

Too bad that it was long enough.

As i headed up the stairs, i noticed that Emma was no place to be found. Pachi, was also missing. And the liquid, yummy tasting Advil that i had left with a spoon and it's child-proof lid on the bottle of Advil, which was sitting on top of the stair ledge, was also gone.

I could feel a sinking feeling in my stomach. And then, full-fledged panic.

As i looked down, there were two big spots of grape-looking Advil stuff on the carpet.

Surely, Emma wouldn't touch....

Would she??

No....she wouldn't.

No way she could get the lid off. It was a child-proof lid.

IT WAS A CHILD-PROOF LID.

Yeah.

She did.

After screaming (i couldn't help it...honestly) her name out, i found her in her little bathroom, standing on her little flower stool, with the water on, rinsing the Advil bottle and spoon.

Trying to remain calm because i was almost hysterical, i asked her:

"Emma, did you take any of that medicine?"

Emma replies, "Ooo, wyes. I hadda cooof, Mama!"

Dear God.

Being calm is not one of my strong points. I pretend that it is, and i even talk myself into thinking i am one of those calm, non-panic-like Mommies.

I'm not.

I grab her off of her stool, shut the water off and take her back into the family room. Stupid Toy Story is in the back ground....i now am beating myself up mentally.

"Damn it, Isabel, how in the hell did you leave that medicine on the ledge of the stairs?? WHAT IN THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?? How careless! How STUPID. OMG, OMG, OMG....PLEASE, GOD, DON'T LET HER HAVE TAKEN MUCH....I am so sorry, God. I am so sorry...I am a horrible, careless mother who has probably killed her child."

Yeah.

I get like that.

I calmly ask Emma, "Sweetie, how much did you take?"

Emma, who is kissing Pachi, "No, Mommy."

Me, to myself, WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?!?!?!?

I grab my cell phone and call poison control, and pray for someone to answer who is use to dealing with first time careless, hysterical Mommies.

"Blah, Blah...Poison Control. Can i help....."

"YES,ITHINKMYFOURYEAROLDDAUGHTERTOOKAWHOLEBOTTOLEOFCHILDREN'SADVILBUTIAMNOTSUREITHINKSHEDIDBUTIDON'TKNOWFORSURE......"

"Can i get your nam....."

"ISABEL,ISABELJOHANNESMYDAUGHTER'SNAMEISEMMASHE'SFOURYEARSOLDHOWCOULDIHAVELEFTTHISBOTTLEONOUTITHASACHILDPROOFLID........"

"Ms. Johannes, please calm......"

"SHOULDIMAKEHERTHROWUPORSHOULDISHAKEHERORMAYBECALLTHEHOSPITAL....."

"Ms. Johannes, listen to me and please stop talking...." (This is where he is thinking to himself "I knew i shouldn't have answered this call!".

"BUTOKAY....."

"Is the bottle empty?"

"YESBUT...."

"Ms. Johannes, ask your daughter, in a CALM voice, if she drank out of the bottle."

"Emma, sweeeetttttiiiieeee, did you drink out of the bottle?"

Emma, who is playing with Pachi's toes replies "Oh, no, Mama...i'd dwink wiff da spooon."

"SHESAIDSHEDRANK......"

"Ms. Johannes, i heard her. Okay, now listen, the chance that she actually poured enough into the spoon to take is unlikely....."

"THERE ARE TWO HUGE SPOTS OF ADVIL ON THE CARPETANDSHEWASCLEANINGTHEBOTTLEOUTINTHESINK"

"....that your daughter took much. Did you say she was cleaning out the bottle in the sink, Ms. Johannes?"

"Yes...." (i'm calming down a little....)

"Please ask Emma how many spoons she took."

"Emmmmaaaaa, how many spoons of medicine did you take, sweeeetttttiiiieeee?"

Emma, who is probably wondering how she ever scored me as a Mommy "I wonly twook owone, Mama. It not state on da spoonnn!"

"SHESAIDSHEONLY......"

"Ms. Johannes, i heard Emma. Okay, Ms. Johannes, i think that your daughter is fine and didn't drink the entire bottle like you think she did. But, to be on the safe side, please call your peditrician, and CALMLY tell them what happened. If you would feel better, you can take her to the ER....."

"No, no....she seems fine....iamsosorry."

"It's okay, Ms. Johannes....just be sure to always put up medicine, alright?"

"sigh.....yes, yes. Thank you....."

"You're very welcome, Ms. Johannes....."


I suppose that someday, but not any day soon, i will look back on this and laugh.

Just not any day soon.

Yeesh....so, folks, be sure to NEVER, EVER, EVER leave out medicine, even if it has a child-proof lid.

Okay?